“God made man stronger but not necessarily more intelligent. He gave women intuition and femininity. And, used properly, that combination easily jumbles the brain of any man I’ve ever met.”
– Farrah Fawcett
Femininity, the word that is almost forbidden in such a masculine world. It’s not particularly what we want to think, but it’s true, femininity is dying, especially in the media.
Now, before anyone starts saying anything about me not realizing women’s true potential and how “anti-progressive” I am, I would like to state that I am a feminist and I am quite liberal. I hold traditional values for myself, but I view society as a progressive and ever-changing atmosphere. I believe that everyone has a choice, and no one should dictate that choice.
I definitely believe there is a stereotype surrounding feminism. The stereotype that feminists hate men, believe chivalry is sexist, and are amazingly angry and loud need to go. For example, I tend to be quite quiet and reserved, but if someone makes sexist jokes or treats anyone like crap, I will stand up for myself and those around me. I’m not angry all the time and I, for sure, do not want to make others around me angry because of my anger. I also absolutely love chivalry. I think it’s endearing when a man holds a door open for me or when my boyfriend gives me his jacket because I’m cold. It tells me that I’m special.
The Balance of Femininity and Masculinity
I’m also a sucker for masculinity. I love men (and women) who are goal-oriented, independent, and logical and I even possess some of these traits. Though, masculinity is associated with hard and aggressive emotions and traits.
I happen to also be a sucker for femininity. Men and women who are compassionate, gentle, and creative also have all of my respect and love. I personally believe that I am more feminine than masculine.
I think we need a balance of both. Going to Taoist beliefs, masculinity and femininity need to be balanced to live a fulfilling life. With the symbol of yin and yang, there is always a bit of femininity in masculinity and vice versa.
A quote from the Tao Te Ching, which is a Chinese philosophical/religious text says:
“When people see things as beautiful,
ugliness is created.
When people see things as good,
evil is created.
Being and non-being produce each other.
Difficult and easy complement each other.
Long and short define each other.
High and low oppose each other.
Fore and aft follow each other.”
It’s important to achieve this balance, but I also believe it is important to grow in which side you feel most connected to. For me, that’s femininity.
What I struggle with most, in terms of growing in my femininity is that I am a very career-oriented woman. I have goals to be a doctor, which I am passionate about achieving. But, I also have goals of being a mother and a homemaker.
That’s where my dilemma lies. How do I work my way through a traditionally masculine career while also trying to stick to traditionally feminine values?
Now, I understand that being a doctor is a very nurturing career to choose, but science is generally considered a masculine field of study (which makes no sense to me due to nursing and how that, in fact, is also a STEM field, but considered a feminine career). So, how do I cultivate the feminine nature of doctoring?
But also, how do I be a doctor while being a homemaker and a mother?
I think the best answer to that is I’m just going to wait and see what happens. The best thing to do is to grow in the present and see where life (and God) takes you. I think that’s the way to be happiest and also the way to grow the most.
How do you grow in masculinity/femininity? What do you think on the subject?
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Lots of love,